What it means to be Welsh.

Shwmae. Croeso i Gemma's byd ac dydd gwyl Dewi hapus.

I can see that my flawless ability to use Google translate to a certain extent has impressed you greatly so that means we're off to a flying start with this blog. If you're a fluent Welsh speaker, then I apologise for my terrible attempts at speaking what should be my mother tongue.

If you, unlike me, speak fluent and coherent Welsh, then you will understand the point that I am trying to get across. That being that yesterday was the day of Saint David, the patron saint of Wales which, as you may know by now, falls on the first of March every year, in remembrance of his death.

Personally, I have always loved Saint David's Day. Unlike most of my class at school who used to enjoy the extra art lessons to make extra Welshy arty things, the extra assembly time to listen to Welsh poems and stories and the extra Welsh cakes at break and lunch times, I used to and still do love the feeling of sharing my national pride with the rest of my country. The only thing I used to hate about this day was my mother's determination to dress me in traditional welsh dress until at least the age of ten (feel free to look it up and feel my pain) but, thankfully, in 2013, we have somewhat caught up with society and modernised our celebrations slightly.

So, what better day to pose the question - What is being Welsh?

Fortunately, it's not all frilly aprons and rugby shirts as it was when I was younger. In 2013, being Welsh means many things in an amalgamation of many diverse cultures.

Am I Welsh because I feel like I fit in more and am more at home on this side of the Severn Bridge than the other? Am I Welsh because my coat is also my jacket? Because 'here', 'ear' and 'year' are all indiscernible? Because Sospan Bach qualifies as a fantastic song even though the lyrics are about a little boy being scrammed by his cat? (Seriously, give it a listen.) Because you'll be there now. In a minute?

As a thorough-bred Welshwoman who has been living in this wonderful country for all of the 20 glorious years of her life, for me, being Welsh mostly means wanting Wales to win the rugby every single time they play, knowing the importance of the difference between a hug and a cwtch, getting irate when people think that Wales is England, (or vise versa), loving my free prescriptions as I go through the motions with my health, being proud of my heritage as one of the purest Celts and resting safe in the knowledge that we have some of the best looking rugby players in the world.

In a recent survey which asked 1,000 Welsh residents a series of questions about being Welsh versus being British, it revealed that 40% identified most with being Welsh, 35% their local community and under a quarter, British.

It's something that I can fully appreciate. For me, it has never been a question of being Welsh, or British or European. I have never questioned my national identity because I have never really felt British, (the exception to this lies in the recent Olympic and Paralympic games in London, as I'm sure is the case with a lot of people.) I have always felt somewhat disconnected from Britain because I've always viewed the UK as being English which I am most certainly not.

Don't get me wrong - I don't really have a problem with the English since meeting some wonderful English people at university and now being in what society perceives as a 'long term' fully function relationship with an Englishman, I suppose I can't really have a problem with them anymore, even if I wanted to. It's just the idea of being anything but Welsh is scary. I wouldn't know how to be a good Englishwoman or Scotswoman or Irishwoman. I'm not formal enough to be English, I hate the sound of the Bagpipes and while I do love potatoes, I don't think I have what it takes to make it in Ireland.

Personally, I don't believe that Welshness is inherent in being born in Wales, speaking Welsh or being ethnically Welsh. I know people who meet all three of those criteria who are English, British or come from further afield and I know people who meet none of those criteria and yet, are some of the most passionate Welsh people you could ever hope to meet. Surely, being Welsh is open to anyone who feels a deep love for this wonderful country and an inherent Welshness when they are here, which is one of the fantastic things about living here.

For me, being Welsh is mostly being proud of and loving the country deeply. Despite the fact that we are on the map as part of the British Aisles, Wales has single handily played its part in making the UK a great place. We brought the world Tom Jones, Dylan Thomas, Joseph Parry, Joe Calzaghe, Catherine Zeta-Jones and, more importantly, the wonderful show that is Gavin and Stacey. We gave Britain Aneurin Bevan, who reformed the NHS in 1948, Roald Dahl who provided some of the best children's literature that I would still happily read to this day and let's not forget that mail order catalogues would not exist if Pryce Pryce-Jones had not first used the post to sell flannel from Montgomeryshire to far away customers, such as Queen Vic. Telephones work because of carbon microphones invented by David Hughes and the world would have no internet or mobile phones had it not been for Donald Davies and his packet switching. Basically, Wales is a country full of fantastic history, culture and achievement.

 But mostly, I think that being Welsh can be summed up in ten comforting points;

1) Being accused of bestiality with sheep is perfectly normal

2) You automatically correct people on their pronunciation of Welsh place names, even if you can't speak the language.

3) You say the word 'like' at least once in every sentence.

4) You feel the overwhelming need to tell people who are not from the UK that Wales is definitely not a part of England.

5) The only sentence you seem to know in Welsh is "Rydw i'n hoffi coffi." Even if you don't like coffee.

6) Wales versus England in the six nations is the most important day of the year. Full stop.

7) You're drawn to the place, despite being born and bred elsewhere.

8) You support whoever is playing against England in the rugby.

9) You have the last name or know someone with the last name Williams, Bevan, Llewelyn, Morgan, Rees, Powell, Howell, Davies, Lewis, Thomas, Jones, Griffiths, Morris, Evans, James, Roberts, Jenkins, Owens or PARRY.

10) A cwtch is the answer to all of your problems.

Basically, whether you love us or hate us, (and if you're English, it's probably the latter), we are here, our country is amazing and full to the brim of a proud people's who simply love their country for what it is. As much as I may not want to quote the guy, as David Cameron said on his Twitter profile yesterday morning, "From one of Europe's oldest living languages, a great literary tradition and incredible music, to world-class sport, mouth-watering cuisine and a thriving business environment - we can all take pride in such a rich culture and heritage."

The only problem is that it's too close to England. 

My name is Gemma and I'm becoming a technology addict

It was a sign of the times this morning in my student house when I woke up and immediately spiraled into a state of panic when I reached for my mobile phone on my bedside table, only to find that it wasn't there. My palms grew sweaty, my throat went dry and my heart started to suffer palpitations. (I may be exaggerating slightly, but we all understand where I'm coming from.) Fortunately, it turned out that I had lovingly put it on charge last night before I went to sleep, it was still very close by and world war III had not broken out while I slept. Unfortunately, it's not something that has never happened before as I'm waking up, going to sleep or going about my general daily business which just goes to show how sad my existence has become.  

Ever since I received my first mobile phone at the tender age of thirteen, it's become my version of a rich man's credit card. I never leave home without my phone. In fact, my phone is constantly with me, whether I am leaving home or not. The thought of being out of touch with the world just makes me panic and puts me on edge. Why I can no longer enjoy the company of one person without checking my emails, text messages, voicemails, Facebook notifications and Tweets just baffles me.

Thankfully, it's not just me. According to research conducted at the end of last year, 29% of people say that they can't live without their mobile phone. The study also showed that only 12% of mobile phone owners says that they have been told that they're spending too much time on their phones, but 39% say that their family, friends and acquaintances will complain if they don't answer calls/ texts fast enough. It seems to me that a startlingly high percentage of people can no longer cope unless they have something to keep them from becoming even the slightest bit bored. And mobile phones do this job exceedingly well.

But who am I to preach about this? I'm just a lowly student who is caught up in the clutches of owning an iphone, going about my daily business whilst being ruled by technology like most of the population. I love Facebook, Twitter, texting and emailing and I probably couldn't go a day without doing any. But I equally hate the feeling that my phone can demand my immediate attention above all else or, even worse, how I am now programmed to gauge my relationships with people based on how quickly they reply to my Facebook message, tweet, text or email. From my boyfriend not replying to my text messages instantaneously to my friends not replying to my tweets whilst they chat to others on Facebook, it's excruciating and realistically, unhealthy. I know that the correct response to these situations is to leave my phone at home and venture outdoors to meet people, but I always feel like I've lost a limb whenever I am parted from my beloved iphone.

Auto cowrecks.com

As hypocritical as it may sound, it's not healthy people, and I think that a growing majority of society have started to think of their phones as less of a tool and more a form of addictive entertainment. If a text message comes through to our phones, does that immediately mean that our lives grind to a halt so that we can read it? Likewise, if a phone call comes at a bad time, (say whilst riding a roller coaster), does that mean that we can't push past the urges to answer? For most of us, yes. Yes it does.

The same can be said for sitting in restaurants or the shopping centres when people have more than a minute to kill - the mobile phones come out. They send text messages, play games, check the latest news and emails, (naturally, something earth shattering has happened since they last checked two minutes ago), they do anything to make sure that they don't become bored for ten seconds.

Why are we so addicted to our mobile phones and all the technology we've accumulated? Perhaps we could live without it, (for an hour at least), and get back to the good old fashioned ways of communication. Perhaps we could read newspapers instead of checking websites every five seconds for our news updates. Perhaps we could get past our computer screens and actually communicate with each other without the benefit of being able to do so from the comfort of our own beds. It makes me sad that these reforms just aren't possible anymore with bullshit technology addictions being introduced into society from left, right and centre to make us feel a bit better about the whole scenario, as seen below;

1) The average mobile phone addict

Nomophobia

An exaggerated, inexplicable and illogical fear of being without a mobile phone, power source or service area. In short, the fear of being away from a mobile phone or being out of contact with others.

Person 1: Do you want to go camping tonight?

Person 2: No. I have nomophobia

Ah the mobile phone addicts. Most of us fit into this category - we take our mobile phones everywhere and anywhere, taking advantage of the fact that it is now possible to make phone calls from just about anywhere with your phone. Let's face it, we all take advantage of those unlimited minutes at each and every opportunity and we all love our phones a bit too much. Unfortunately, those opportunities fail to evaporate once we are inside public bathroom stalls and I'm finding that bathroom teleconferences are starting to get increasingly tedious.

2) The text addict.

Textaphrenia

Being addicted to text messaging. Can manifest into thinking you've heard or felt a new text message vibration when there is no message.

Dammit, I just suffered from a bullshit disorder when I thought my phone vibrated. I'll call it Textaphrenia.

These ones are easy to spot due to the large, overdeveloped thumbs and the inclination to look the slightest bit cross eyed due to constantly staring at mobile phone screens. The tri-tone of an incoming text message can only be likened to cocaine or alcohol to them. There's no way possible to resist it, and they wouldn't even dream of trying to.

3) The internet junkie.

Internet addiction disorder (IAD)

A person who is addicted to the internet. If there is a lack of internet access in the immediate area, these people will suffer from withdrawal symptoms.

Let me just blog about that.

Internet junkie's spend hours at a time on the computer at home and so, internet enabled mobile phones are a way for them to leave the house without developing those withdrawal symptoms mentioned above. They are in a unending loop on constantly checking sites for the latest news, Facebook notifications, Tweets, weather, forum updates and so on. Most of us, especially students, fit into this category, which is what I refer to as the 'normal category'. (With nothing better to do than degrees, can you really blame us?) The more abnormal branch of this category, however, seem to think that the world actually cares that the hamburger they just gorged on in Disneyworld gave them a severe heartburn. I speak for myself, and more than likely, everyone when I say that we can cope without every intricate detail of your lives. Really.

I am coming to a point, I promise.

Of course, these phones can and often do make our lives easier and, as I've already said, I genuinely don't know how I would survive without mine, (though I'd like to give it a go one day.) What I don't agree with, however, is what technology has done to people. It absolutely baffles me - we spend our time and energy planning holidays, family get togethers and reunions of friends that we haven't seen in years - only to spend those times ignoring everyone and everything around us so that we can play with our damn phones. Don't get me wrong, I have enormous sympathy for anyone who has broken down, is going into labour or is facing some sort of other genuine crisis that requires the phone service to make an urgent call, but can't the rest of the population who aren't stranded, impregnated or in crisis chill out? Let's face it people, being temporarily disconnected may actually be a good thing.

Now excuse me while I publish this blog, Facebook and Tweet it, email it to my parents and call my Nan to tell her it's finally online. 

Welcome to the valleys

As most of you who have met me or have read this blog thoroughly will know, I originate from a little town in the South Wales valley named Merthyr Tydfil. In this area of Wales, we are simple folk - there are around 55,000 of us unwillingly residing there, many of us don't speak welsh unless we are drunk, (which we usually are), we have ironworks and steelworks that are, instead of being used to fuel our poor unemployment rates, used as museums that no one ever goes to, and it is nearly always raining.  Welcome!

The real valleys 

I'm not portraying my hometown in the best light to be perfectly honest, but then again, not many people will. The ironic thing it that I absolutely adore Merthyr, and my home villages of Aberfan and Troedyrhiw, (which are legitimate names, I assure you.) Since I left the Valley's upon receiving my A level results, I've been feeling very nostalgic about the place. Don't get me wrong, the moment I found out I was leaving home, I was ecstatic. Like most students, I was looking forward to having my own space, freedom to do what I wanted and when; to eat, sleep, work and stumble in from a night out whenever I liked, to essentially become my own person. But unlike most of my fellow students, I was also excited to escape from the shackles of Merthyr Tydfil. I was sick and tired of always driving towards a mountain, never mind my destination, of seeing sheep grazing on the side of the roads as I made my way to school in the mornings, and of being known by everyone as 'Mike Parry from the council's daughter', or 'Lynne Marshall's granddaughter', (my Nan is on what we refer to as the council of village elders.) More importantly, I was sick and tired of being tarred with a brush that says that Merthyr is one of the most miserable places to live in Britain, alongside some generally high statistics regarding youth crime and drugs.

Of course, this was all before the moving out stage. As I approached the last weeks of living in Merthyr, I found that I had fallen in love with it all over again. I started to appreciate everything a little bit more, even the abundant amounts of foliage and farm animals casually strolling down the road. So by the time it came to my departure, I found that I didn't really want to leave.

From my arrival to Swansea University to this very day, I cannot get through a conversation without someone asking or clarifying where I'm from, followed by a startled gasp and then an awkward silence, as I silently curse the person in front of me for judging my wonderful town. I can't say I blame them, because the media portrays us to be the worst place to live in Wales, especially the latest show to come out of it, which most of the population have probably seen by now.

Let's start on the right footing; The MTV 'hit' show, aptly named The Valleys, is absolute shit. I realise I'm a bit late off the mark on this one but, seriously, I've watched one episode of the show and I can't see what would possess anyone to want to continue watching it beyond the first few seconds. The general idea of the show is that MTV locate a bunch of young people from the Welsh valleys, (even though not all of them are actually from the valleys), who apparently have big dreams and aspirations of 'making it' in the music/modelling/porn star industries. These like minded individuals all believe that their only chance of making it is to get out of the valleys and try their luck in the big city of Cardiff. Not London, the capital of the United Kingdom, but Cardiff, the capital of the country they're trying to escape from. The mind boggles.

MTV - The Valleys cast

So, the show opens and the cast of Barbie dolls and drama kings come up on the screen and say how there are no opportunities in the valleys, no jobs and tell the cameras about how sick they are of the fresh air, the sheep, the hills and the pound shops, (which, as a student, I personally love), generally begging to be taken from this God awful place and leave the valleys forevermore, putting me out of my misery of ever seeing them in Tesco again. For those of us who live there or have lived in the valleys, those ideas aren't generally new, and not entirely out of place, especially regarding the unemployment rates. However, after spending 18 years of my life in the valleys and nearing 2 years in the city of Swansea, I can safely say that there are plenty of people in the cities who would also moan about the lack of jobs, who would say that they're sick of the concrete, stray dogs and cars. Basically, people seem to always be discontented wherever they are.

With all that being said, I still have a huge problem with the show.

Like most people who have objections to it, I could moan about the drunkenness, the immorality of it all and the irresponsible and sometimes vile attitudes towards sex and interconnected relationships that the show promotes. But, I think that that may be a little hypocritical, especially on the issue of states of intoxication, so I'll leave that job to the older and more moral generation of the Valleys. Likewise, I'm not going to do the obvious and bang on about how the show paints the valleys in a bad light. It's obvious that not everyone in the valleys behaves in that way, even if some of them do. But that can be said for any area of the UK. Nobody actually meets me and expects me to get my tits out within five seconds of meeting them, just because I'm from the valleys. It doesn't work like that, and, sorry to disappoint, but I certainly don't work like that.

MTV logo - The Valleys

My main concern about this show is that it promotes laziness, spinelessness and escapism. The idea that the show promotes to young people is that if you live in an area where 'making it' is tough, you need to leave it, rather than face the situation up front and deal with it. It's so easy to identify the problem and then moan about it and, let's be honest with ourselves, many people from the valleys do exactly that. It takes a lot more creativity and courage to make something good out of a bad situation, but I think that it is achievable. I admit that the opportunities in Merthyr are few and far between, but that doesn't mean that people should just pack up and go. You have to make your own opportunities, open your own doors and realise that not everything you want in life is going to be handed to you on a silver platter, as much as I would like it to be. That goes for anywhere, not just the valleys. Admittedly, I'm probably a bit hypocritical saying that, as I don't live there anymore but, for what it's worth, I'd go back in a heartbeat, even though I left and am currently working towards a degree in 'the city'. That kind of amazing stuff doesn't happen to someone who aims to grab five minutes of fame through becoming a WAG or a glamour model or joining a shit reality show that isn't even realistic.

   

I appreciate that the valleys don't usually have huge multiplex cinemas, bendy buses with TV screens on board or a vibrant nightlife beyond having a flagon in the park and running when you hear police sirens. Admittedly, whenever I venture to London to visit my boyfriend, I am always in awe of everything going on there and sometimes wish that we had all those wonderful things back at home. However, unlike London or any city in Wales, we do have some things going for us in the valleys beyond showing off our tits, the farm animals all over the place and the MTV show 'The Valleys', and they come in threefold;

1) An epic countryside to abuse

2) A genuine community spirit

3) And, above all else, a tidy accent.